From: Chris Raboin [mailto:email@example.com]
Sent: Wednesday, February 18, 2015 7:51 PM
Subject: Casting for "You Have Been Warned (An Ultrashort Comedy)"
You Have Been Warned is an ultrashort comedy arising out of my personal disdain for the uncontrolled proliferation of ridiculous warnings. (Ultrashort means that we intend the film to be shorter than this announcement.)
Today, if you purchase a product that still comes with an instruction manual, it seems like a preponderance of the space is used for warnings that are of no value to the moderately intelligent user. The manufacturer is more concerned about warning you about the product rather than instructing you how to use the product.
You have been warned that the food you want to eat in restaurants is unsafe, you can suffocate in a dry cleaning bag, fat people should stay off of ladders of all types, your adolescent son can drowned in a common bucket, that all playground equipment is as dangerous as a jet fighter, and that pregnant women shouldn't smoke cigarettes (which if you have not heard -- is not good for you even when you are not pregnant or even if you are of a gender that can't get pregnant).
In response to being repeatedly warned involuntarily, when I see a warning I do the adult thing and throw the users manual away or tear the warning sticks off the products I've purchased. But apparently I'm not the only irritated and immature consumer out there, because now manufacturers all seem to indelibly imbed these warnings into the products they sell.
Like military Humvees, warning stickers have been up-armored. Warning stickers on metals surfaces are made inaccessible with a coat of clear paint and the warnings on other products (like the one on the top of your car visor that you see everyday -- but that you probably don't know what it says) are made to be a part of the product. You can't get rid of those warnings without literally throwing the product away and starting from scratch.
In futile protest to all of this, You Have Been Warned will present fictional warnings for some of few products that still don't come with a warning (e.g., pizza, men between the ages of 18 and 27, bras, pancakes, diapers, forks and marshmallow chicks). After each warning is presented, the audience (like a contestant in a game show) will be given a multiple choice question to see if they can identify the product to which the fictitious warning belongs.
We are shooting this film at a variety of alternative times over the next two weeks (most of the roles are short -- so you only need to be at one (not all) of the shoots). All of the shoots will be in beautiful Downtown Tucson.
We are casting for 25 actors (all over 18) but otherwise of all genders, ages, shapes, sizes and preferences. If you have a resume and headshot -- send them. But most importantly, let me know if you want to be a part of it.
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